From courting to dating
Orbuch has studied 373 couples for more than 28 years through the University of Michigan's Survey Research Center, and her research shows that frequent small acts of kindness are a predictor of happiness in a relationship. By doing these small tasks on a regular basis, you'll help your partner feel noticed. In Motivation and Emotion study, couples that remembered laughing together—like the time a grocery store clerk did something funny in the checkout line—reported greater relationship satisfaction than those who remembered experiences that were positive, but not necessarily when they'd laughed.
"Laughter reminiscence packs an additional punch because people relive the moment by laughing again," says study author Doris Bazzini, Ph D, a psychologist at Appalachian State University in Boone, N. RELATED: 29 Days to a Healthier Relationship It's no secret that getting buff helps you out in the bedroom by boosting your endurance, strength, and flexibility—but a sweat session also has more immediate effects.
What most couples don't realize, though, is that it doesn't take much to help your partner feel more valued every day.
"Endorphins from exercise give you an adrenaline rush that boosts arousal," Orbuch says.
Activities that get your heart rate up, like hiking, running, or biking, are guaranteed to have a positive effect on desire.
Nonsexual touching like hugging or handholding is just as important as sex itself in keeping your relationship healthy.
"Touching is probably the most definitive way to let other people know you're in a relationship,'" Goldsmith says.