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Instead of focusing on things like appearance, the type of car he drives and "all the adjectives you've had since you were 24," she says, "really [figure] out the feelings you want to feel in a partnership and what that looks like in real life.

Women of maturity learn that there are so many different attributes of a man that count so much more." 3. " There's still more "me work" to be done when dating like a grown-up.

Both kinds are popular, so you can’t go just by that.

In the 2016 Consumer Reports Online Dating Survey, more than 9,600 people who had used an online dating service in the last two years were asked which one they had joined.

There's still the matter of erasing "those recordings that play in your head about men and relationships," Palmer said.

"'Men only want sex, men don't want relationships...' It's about getting past your limiting beliefs." Palmer acknowledges that these beliefs can become as automatic as "blinking," but said it's a matter of first recognizing that those beliefs exist and working through why you feel that way. "Make a plan of where and how you're going to meet the right men and how to get a date," Palmer advised.

For all the positive stories of long lost loves and happily married couples we post on Huff/Post50, we know that many are finding themselves back in the dating game for the first time in years.

If your goal is to get a date—or find a mate—are you better off with one type over the other?"We all mature -- most of us -- and this is the best time for anyone to date." Though there are new realities to deal with if you're dating after 50 (illness, sandwich generation concerns, menopause or impotence), it shouldn't dampen your love life or make you settle for anyone less than who you deserve."It's about undoing 35 years of thoughts, beliefs and truths that don't work anymore," Palmer said.Compassion is the key to having an enjoyable time when you're dating. "Rendezvous to romance." So you've fallen in love with yourself, created a more realistic and flexible list of the traits you'd like in a partner, broadened your social circle and got the date with a man you're attracted to... "On a first and second date you're not trying to figure out if you're going to marry him," Palmer said with a chuckle. " Fast forward to a future version of yourself who's a few dates in with this new man."You want to put your best foot forward [and] you want to show personality." And putting your best foot forward means knowing what "baggage" needs to be checked at the door. You've reached the final step of dating like a grown-up: after all the self-reflection and open conversation "[apply] that to making the decision if they're still a good partner," Palmer said.

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